As we (hopefully) approach the warmer weather, many women start their ritualistic, stress- induced diets, dreading [da….da…dum….] – the bikini season! I could never understand why shopping for a bathing suit is one of the most stressful experiences for a woman.

You may snidely say that’s because you’re thin, but no, really…. I’ve been plumper post-partum. And I even wore bikinis when I was pregnant. Why are women THAT self-conscious when it comes to showing off their bodies on the beach?

Unless you walk around wearing so much loose clothing that it camouflages your body like a bubble, I hate to break it to you, but people know your shape already. We know if you’ve got big boobs, a bit of a belly, a great butt, and the general notion of your figure. Wrapping some spandex or latex around it really won’t reveal anything unknown.

Also, on the beach or laying poolside, the playing field is leveled. Everyone there is bared down. And if they are wrapped up like a mummy, then they are the ones out of place – not you for putting on that bikini. Hey, if someone thinks that your thighs are too thick, they certainly are putting themselves in the same position for you to verbally decide how you would Photoshop them, too, when they are exposing skin that they normally keep a bit more clad.

When people try to cover up what they feel are their flaws, they actually wind up drawing more attention to those parts of their bodies that they were trying to make invisible. (This applies to all types of clothing, not just swimwear.) When I see a woman wading into the water in her shorts, it looks out of place. Sorry but baggy, saggy, sopping wet material bunched up around your butt is not flattering. Swimming in a wet t-shirt over a bathing suit just makes you look soggy and wrinkly, and really, I just want to walk over to you and ask you if I can wring it out. You can’t tell me that you’re comfortable wrapped up in a wet t-shirt, shivering until the sun dries it out in an hour, post swim.

Remember when you were a kid? At the first sign of a hot summer day you would run and put a bathing suit on and go jump in the water. You didn’t stare at yourself and pick on your parts in a mirror. You didn’t care if your friends saw you in a bikini that conformed to your physique. You were too concerned with having fun. What changed? Isn’t that how it still should be now?

With the exception of considering how a swimsuit may give you some tan lines in places you didn’t intend, why are women self-conscious as adults when it comes to swimwear? Unless you are going for the butt-floss look or going for the next “Nipple-Gate”, there really is nothing to be embarrassed about.

And somehow, most of the female population has been brainwashed into thinking that wearing a black bikini or one piece will magically make you thinner and act as an automatic eraser of the self-criticism that goes on in your mind. Guess what? If you don’t love yourself in red, green, white, yellow, or pink with orange polka dots, the color black won’t make you love yourself anymore either. You’re not fooling anyone. You’re just looking like you have an aversion to anything but the monochromatic and looking like you live in a 1930’s black (and white) movie.

And here’s a tip – don’t try on swimsuits in front of a three-way mirror. We are human, and therefore view people either coming or going with some limited peripheral vision, but there’s no way one person can see you from all angles at once. Talk about distorting body image – these mirrors are the worst culprits! It’s best to face your fear of exposure, one side at a time.

It would be great if we could Photoshop ourselves into our ideal visions in real life, but we can’t. What’s easier (and healthier) to do is embrace what we have been gifted, and go to the beach without bashing our bodies. And remember – a guy never said “no” to a woman because her butt was a bit big or her thighs were a little thick…. Honey, get over yourself, go get a bikini wax, and get your swimsuit on!!

Writer:Laura Madsen      and her Twitter

Thanks for the support and love 🙂   Your REglam Team xx

If you digged this article, then you will dig these –> Positive Thinking, How to have Self Confidence with Your Body, Dear 13 year old me 

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