My next question is ‘Why do these flaws matter?’
These flaws only matter if you let them. To me, none of these things matter like you may expect them too. I’m lucky to have made peace with myself at the age of only nineteen. I honestly didn’t expect to for a long time. I guess you’re probably wondering how I overcame my negative perceptions of my own body. It was through the cold hard truth, which I’m going to pass on to you now.
You have one body and one mind. Torturing yourself trying to obtain and become something you’re not can cause you a lot of damage, emotionally and physically. We were all born differently, with different shapes and different sizes. It’s something we can’t change. We need to learn to live with it and accept it. If you were born with a big build, then you can starve yourself for months and see very little change in your body. Just like if you’ve been born with a high metabolism, then you can eat and eat until you make yourself sick and you’re unlikely to put on weight. I used to think if I overate then I’d grow boobs. Needless to say, it didn’t work. As long as you’re healthy and you’re body isn’t malnourished and you are not dangerously obese, then you need to stop hating those little wobbly bits or wishing for those boobs to grow. Let’s start noticing the things we really like about ourselves.
I read once that looking at yourself naked in the mirror can help. I remember the days when I couldn’t even look at my face in the mirror because what I saw upset me. So let’s take it one step at a time.
Just because something looks good on someone else, doesn’t mean that same thing is going to look good on us. Let’s come to terms with it now. Different clothing is created for different body types. If you’re busty, then maybe you can hold up that strapless top. I can’t. If you’ve got legs like me, you might struggle to find certain jeans. Don’t be ashamed of this. Shop for what looks good on you, not what looks good on the runway.
Something that can instantly make you feel more comfortable in your own skin is underwear. Go and get your bust measured. Make sure your bra is a good fit, and then treat yourself to some matching underwear. I instantly feel a little more confident when my underwear is matching.
Look at yourself in the mirror. Take a good look. Stand there for at least fifteen minutes and just look. The first thing you’ll see is what you think are flaws, but these things are what make you YOU. These things make you different from the next person. They are unique. After you’ve looked past these flaws, find the things you like about yourself. Pick at least three. For example, I would choose my hair, my thighs and my behind. Maybe you like your hips, your bust or even your feet? Don’t leave that mirror until you’ve got at least three things! When you’re picking clothes, look for clothes that draw attention to these things that you like.
Another thing that picks me up is having an evening where I can just spend some time on myself: washing my hair, shaving, painting my nails, giving myself a little time to relax and think. I also like to make sure my facial hair is maintained so I get my eyebrows and upperlip waxed. If you’ve got fair eye lashes like me you could get them tinted.
Don’t change your body. Change the way you think about your body. Do things that make you feel good about yourself, be it volunteering, running, reading, writing, or whatever it is, just go and do it. That’s how to become comfortable in your own body.
Remember, you are beautiful!
I am not lying, I promise. Every single person is a masterpiece. We are all unique and that’s what makes us beautiful. You are not a copy, you are an original, and that’s what you should want to be, always.
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Thanks for the support and love 🙂 Your REglam Team xx
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